Hello again.

Well it's been awhile. Not sure exactly how long but my intention to write a regular blog bit the dust quite early on. No particular reason...just lack of enthusiasm I guess. I can't say lack of time as I tend to have a fair bit of that on my hands. Since my marriage broke up some years back now,  I've no shortage of that available...despite working six days a week in my own business. Having become something of a social recluse you would think my blogging career would have taken off exponentially. But no. I wasn't even sure I'd be able to locate this blog on here but you can't lose anything on the Internet apparently. A cursory search soon rediscovered it (as I secretly knew it would). Blogging is something that always seems like a great idea till you start doing it. At least that's my take on it. I actually have another business related blog on Wordpress (I sell outdoor gear) which I've been a bit more consistent with and attentive to. Only problem is it's difficult to deal with personal stuff on there...so here I am. Will I stick it out this time? No clue. But I plan to try. I talk to myself a lot so I should be a natural at this but of course nothing is that simple. My life hasn't changed much since my last entry. I'm am still on my own and still not coping particularly well with things. The head stuff I mean. I hit upon a very successful way of keeping going through problematic times a while back and while it works in the short term it has its drawbacks. It's called burying ones head in the sand and not thinking too far ahead. Now there is much to recommend it, especially the latter part as it can simplify life a little and in some ways it is a natural enough way to live. On the other hand it can also (with the former emphasis) create as many problems as it solves in that stuff gets left undone...and things get sidelined and put off until some mysterious future date when you will feel better able to deal with them. Now I'm not dismissing that side of it either because the one thing my prolonged personal difficulties has taught me is that it's sometimes unwise to tackle certain things before you are ready. The problem is that some of these things never get tackled as that day never seems to come and of course that can have consequences that provide something else to push further downthe  pipeline...and do 

so it goes. I guess it's a bit of a trade off ...the things in question are many and varied but mainly cover the emotional and the financial. Often they are ...to borrow that phrase from the N I peace process pre agreement  machinations...inextricably linked. They can also be health related which adds another particular twist to the whole anxiety process. The other thing that has changed since I last put virtual pen to paper on this site is that I no longer consider myself as part of the Christian faith community. That is as good a way as any to put it...to be honest it is a difficult subject for me to adress with those friends who are "believers" so in general I have not done so preferring to throw out euphemistic comments about "taking a break from church" etc rather than nailing it down. It is perhaps as much for their benefit as mine as I don't really know how to explain it in a way that a believing person would fully (or even partly ) grasp and there are very few, if any , of my former church associates that I would feel comfortable discussing it with. I will come back to this but that's how it stands...if any of them are reading this I hope they will not be offended by the above. If they are...well that's part of the problem. 

Well anyway...that's it for now. I guess I'm back.